Wednesday, April 14, 2010

surfing the net today i came across a video about adult children friending their parent on facebook. the gist of the piece is that a 26 year old man got a friend request from his dad. after some pressure from his dad to accept his friend request, he did so, but it was against his better judgement. the son had a sense that this might not be the wisest move. as it happened, he was right to be concerned, in my view. why? because the dad went on to post, on the son's facebook page, some mildly embarrassing pictures of the son growing up. pictures of the son at about age 5 making funny faces and one of him sitting on a pot at that potty training age. one might question the dad's motive for posting said pics. was it because he thought his son was a cutie growing up and wanted to share that with the world. or was it to cause his son some degree of embarassment. whatever the motivation, the son didn't appreciate his dad posting the pictures. the son un-friended his dad and doing so caused some further friction between the two. i can understand his irritation with his dad for posting personal photos on the son's page. the two were able to resolve the issue but they still are not friends on the facebook. consider this. you and your adult child are facebook friends. you read a posting on a mutual fbf''s page relating something momentous to this mutual friend that hasn't been shared with you. what would be your approach in that case. let's say for example your daughter share's with her bff that she thinks she might be pregnant. she hasn't shared that bit of news with you yet. do you wait for her to get around to telling you. or would you be like me? i would be prone to say to her "so, why is it that i have to read on facebook that you think you might be pregnant. don't you think it would have been nice to share that news with me before posting it for the world to see?". i guess i've not put a lot of thought into the whole facebook friend phenomenon. now this piece about the troubles between a dad and his son has me wondering if this kidsdonegone blog thing i've got going on, which i share on my facebook page, is perhaps causing some embarrassment to one or all of my kids. if so, i hope they would tell me. i hope it's not a problem for them, but i don't intend to stop. tendering my thoughts and frustrations via the blog is a therapeutic outlet for me. and there is always a choice open to them-- they can simply not read the drivel i have posted there if it bothers. and i'm out.

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