Sunday, September 26, 2010

the circle of life...

i knew before we left for cincy that one my aunties, dad's sister l., had suffered a stroke and was not expected to live.  it was with something of  a heavy heart that we made the trip, planned months ago. while we were there we received a call informing us that l. had passed. not unexpected, but in that same call we learned that another of his sisters, c., had died the very next day. again not totally unexpected, as she had not been doing well of late. 

to receive the news of 2 dear aunties' passing, one day apart, takes one's breath away just a bit.  i'm 63, so you can figure that dad's sisters (all the brothers passed long ago)  are well up in years.  the same story is true for mom's side of the family.

none of us will make it out of this world alive.  still the prospect of losing those close to you is a sad one.

i can't say for sure if it is their generation, or if it is just my family, but my recollection of exchanging hugs and "i love yous", as i grew up are few.  that doesn't mean there wasn't affection, i just don't recall it being expressed  out loud and in so many words.

the prospect that these dear aunties, on both sides, may not be with us too much longer makes me sad.  with the passing of l. and c., i have promised myself i'd sit down with pen and paper with intention of sending them each a token of my affections and fondest memories. i have to do it now,  before i've waited too long.

it's true i could just pick up the phone, but not unlike many, speaking "i love yous" out loud is hard for me.  for me the written word allows me an eloquence i somehow lack when attempting to express my feelings aloud.

that, and the fact that once that phone call is ended, there is no trace of the words of affection outside what may well be a failing memory. 

on that note, i'll close,  i have 6 notes to aunties to write, and 3 to cousins who just lost their mom. aio

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